Got a headache? Go for a run
Stressed out? Go for a run
Bad day at work? Go for a run
Boyfriend/Girlfriend pissing you off? Go for a run
Ate too much last night? Go for a run
…and the list goes on.
To me, and I’m sure many other runners out there running is our ” go to” when you have a problem. Yesterday, the mental running goal I made for myself was to go out for 3 mi easy. I figured this would be a good start since I’m still taking it easy, it sucks, and it was basically a monsoon out on LI.
Well things changed.
I did my 3 mi at 10:00min pace. It seemed like a little bit of a struggle, but whatever I’m still recovering. I stop, attempt to go do my cool down, and I’m feeling good. So what’s a runner supposed to do? Keep running of course! I did another 2 mi. I stop, think, and say to myself keep going you feel good. Out for another 3 miles I went. I needed this, I need running. I had so much on my mind–my review was the next day. The next 3 miles were spent thinking. I figured out what my game plan was for my review and what changed between my running from when I started back in February till now. Back when I started, I was like an eager puppy. I just wanted to get out there and go, no matter how far it was. Anything and everything was an accomplishment. I loved testing myself and proving others or my training plan wrong, that I could run that extra mile. By June, I was kicking butt. I went from running an 11:30 mile to a 7:06 and from being barely able to run a 1/2 mile to running 8 miles straight. I was doing my 300m speed workouts at :45 which are now at :65(on a good day). Things got weird. I signed up for my first 5k and trained my ass off. I wanted this. I knew I had it in the bag. Race day: I bombed it. It was a cold and rainy day, the streets were filled with puddles, I was running in an inch deep of water and mentally I just wasn’t there, I checked out. I ran it in a 31:54, the slowest 5k I had ever run. I wanted to give up running. For the next two weeks I bashed myself. Then I signed up for my first half marathon. Training went great btu the race itself was brutal. I ate wrong the night before and had a pinched nerve in my neck. Clearly it had potential to be a great race, not. But whatever, I took a much needed mental break and then tried to get back into the swing of things. Hence tried. I don’t know what happened to the Brianna that was so eager and just wanted to run fast and far. Now I was so hung up on numbers, whether it be time, mileage, or weekly miles. Running was still fun, but it was different. I lost the spark. I wasn’t exceeding as well as I used to during my runs and it killed me. I was still pushing myself, but not like how I used to. What was I afraid of? I used to tell myself “Keep going, the worst that can happen is you’ll throw up.” Now I’m to obsessed with trying to go fast or adding more miles that I’m not. I know it’s all mental, but I couldn’t get out of my head. Until last night. Those last 3 miles were the best out of the entire run. I pushed myself, and thought back why am I doing this to myself. Keep going, push, run faster. I just want to go fast damn it! I thought to myself, all the greats surpass fear, pain, and speed why can’t I? (meaning of course that those feelings are all relative to every individual) So I began using some imagery, I pictured myself winning & running fast and what do you know? I started running fast. I let go of every thought I had and just ran as hard and fast as I could. The last half mile I thought about how Shalane won the Miami Half, how many feelings she had to overcome to get there mentally and physically. I wanted to push myself, I wanted to go there, I want to PR again. I sprinted all the way home and felt amazing. The only reason I stopped was b/c my legs felt like they wanted to go to sleep. First LR post injury, I’d say went great. It may not of been my fastest long run, but I’m back mentally and physically. I’m going to use January to get back into the swing of things and get my mileage back up. Come Febraury, it’s half marathon training baby and I’m going to PR the hell out of it.
My top two favorites for Houston, as if you couldn’t have guess already, are…
How could you not love him?
Until next time,
Run hard. Run long. Run strong.
Have you ever went through a running funk? How did you get out of it? Let me know!